Back in the summer of 2015, a website’s user base was hacked, and its users’ personal information was publicly released. Over 11 million peoples’ names, addresses and credit card details were revealed. And what was the website? Ashley Madison .com. The name may not be familiar to you, (hopefully not!) but here’s what the strapline for the website was: ‘Life is short. Have an affair.’ In effect, Ashley Madison was a register of people actively seeking to have an affair. Or, in the words of the Bible, to commit adultery.
Now here’s the thing. What do you think of the people whose names were found in that database? They had signed up for this adultery website, they entered in their information, never expecting it to be revealed to the world. How do you think of them? Were they stupid? Immoral? Shameless? Sinful?
You see, when we hear some of the Ten Commandments, we can feel a bit like the rich young ruler who came to see Jesus in Matthew 19. Do you remember him? He came to Jesus, asking what he had to do to get eternal life. Jesus gives him some of the Commandments - ‘Do not murder, do not commit adultery, do not steal, do not give false testimony, honour your father and your mother, and love your neighbour as yourself.’ (Matt 19:18-19) And how does the man reply? ‘All these I have kept.’
When we hear those commandments, we might feel like congratulating ourselves - yup, I’ve never done that. Never committed murder; never committed adultery. If adultery is being unfaithful to marriage vows; having sex with someone who is not your husband or wife; then you’ve either done it or not - and if not, then you might think that you get a big tick beside that commandment. I’ve not done it. And I’ll congratulate myself on not doing it.
If you were here last week, though, you’ll realise that you shouldn’t be so quick to congratulate yourself on the keeping of the commandments. Last week, we looked at the command which says ‘Do not murder’ - and Jesus raised the bar, he lifted the standard even higher - he said that you can murder people in your hearts even if you never murder anyone with your hands. There’s a danger to our anger - that it’s just as guilty as murder.
And so, as Jesus addresses the theme of adultery, again we find that the bar is being raised higher; that he is going beyond the external and physical, and he goes deep down into our hearts. And as Jesus does that, we find that we need to move from congratulation to conviction.
Look at verse 27: ‘You have heard that it was said, “Do not commit adultery.” But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery in his heart.’
Now, ladies, just because Jesus addresses men here doesn’t mean that you are off the hook. The same principle applies for you as well. Adultery in the heart is still adultery. It may be unseen by anyone else, with no dangerous deeds and illicit liaisons risking being caught, but adultery in the heart is still adultery. Could it be that we’re under conviction?
Mostly when I’m driving around, I’ll be listening to sermons and podcasts. But sometimes I’ll have Radio Ulster on, and if it’s early afternoon, I’ll realise that Hugo Duncan’s on and swiftly change the channel. But a while back I left it on, and heard these lyrics: ‘I can say I’ve never been unfaithful, but I can’t say it’s never crossed my mind.’ I don’t know who it was who was singing, but those words stuck with me - it’s precisely what Jesus is saying about adultery of the heart. It’s still adultery!
So what is it that you think of? Or perhaps to phrase it more directly, who is it that you think of? They may be someone you know, or they may be a celebrity. Are you committing adultery in your heart, by unfaithfulness to your marriage partner; or if you’re not married, by unfaithfulness to your future husband or wife, or by unfaithfulness to your current single state of chastity.
But you may have noticed that Jesus went even further than just the heart - by specifically mentioning the eyes. ‘I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent...’ Jesus seems to be saying that adultery in the heart begins with this lustful look.
In our first reading we heard of King David’s adultery with Bathsheba. How did it begin? ‘One evening David got up from his bed and walked around on the roof of the palace. From the roof he saw a woman bathing. The woman was very beautiful, and David sent someone to find out about her... Then David sent messengers to get her. She came to him, and he slept with her.’ (2 Sam 11:2-4).
David saw her (lustfully) and then sent for her, and then slept with her. It unleashed disaster in David’s personal life, and in the nation as a whole, and ended in him killing Bathsheba’s husband to cover up the fact that she was pregnant.
Looking lustfully is adultery in the heart. Yet it’s very obvious that our society is obsessed with sex; providing and promoting material for the eyes. The advertisers know that sex sells. And it’s everywhere. And that’s before you even think of the internet with its easy access. Never mind the people you know, work with, or pass on the street.
Jesus is not saying here that men should not look at women at all - or that women should cover up in a burkha like Muslim women. As John Stott says, we all know the difference between looking and lusting. It could be the second look, the forming of a memory, a fantasy. And because we know the difference between looking and lusting, we recognise the sin in our life. Conviction, rather than congratulation. Adultery in the heart is still adultery.
So what can we do about it? Jesus proposes a radical remedy, which sounds shocking. ‘If your right eye causes you to sin, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lost one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell.’ Your eye, and your hand - if they’re the cause of sin, then get rid of them.
Jesus is not expecting to be taken literally here - after all, to remove your right eye still leaves your left for lustful looks, and even if both eyes are removed, you can still lust in your heart. Rather, he is saying that we need to be firm with sin in our life. Mortification of sin (putting it to death), not mutilation of our bodies. To misquote an old manifesto pledge: Tough on sin, tough on the causes of sin. So if you use your eye to look lustfully, then act as if you were blind and look away at something else. Avoid it entirely. And if your hand is clicking on those websites, then stop clicking there! Cut it right out of your life. Get a dumbphone if a smartphone is your downfall. Don’t play with temptation; don’t toy with sin - you’re more vulnerable and weak that you imagine.
As Job says in chapter 31 of his book: ‘I made a covenant with my eyes not to look lustfully at a girl.’ (Job 31:1) If you’re struggling with this, then make that covenant with your eyes. Use some accountability software. Get help - ask a Christian friend to ask those difficult questions; to come alongside and help you through.
Jesus is teaching that to not commit adultery is more than what we do with our bodies - it’s what we do with our eyes, minds, and hearts as well. But perhaps you’re wondering - why is it so wrong? Why does God need to be involved in what we do with our bodies, or who we sleep with, or who we think about?
It matters to God, because God made us, and the commandments are an expression of what it means to live in relationship with God as his people, his image bearers. Behind each of the commandments is an essential element of God’s character. You can puzzle through what each of the other commandments tells us about God, but the call to not commit adultery reflects the covenant faithfulness of God.
To not commit adultery is to positively promote faithfulness and love in God’s good idea of marriage. Our marriages are to reflect God’s covenant faithfulness to us, his people. The final scene of the Bible is the wedding of the Lamb (the Lord Jesus) and his bride (the church). But throughout the Old Testament, God uses the image of marriage to speak of his relationship with his people. We see the times when Israel is described as an unfaithful wife, an adulteress, running after other husbands, other gods. The prophet Hosea is called to love his unfaithful wife as a real life example of God’s love for his unfaithful people.
Yet by the time of Jesus, the religious leaders permitted divorce for any and every reason. All it would take was a certificate of divorce, and a man could throw his wife out. So, the dinner was burned, and that’s it, out you go. The man had the power, and the women was weak, vulnerable, with nowhere else to turn. She would need to find another husband. Yet Jesus confronts the situation head on. He says there in verse 32 that to divorce, except for marital unfaithfulness, is to force your wife into adultery.
There are some times when divorce is necessary. But Jesus is pointing to the importance of marriage, and faithfulness in that marriage. In this way, we reflect the covenant faithfulness of God, and submit to his purpose for marriage.
But, as we finish, let me say one more thing. It’s very important to hear this very clearly. Sometimes the church can appear to suggest that the worst type of sin is sexual sin, as if there’s a league table of respectable sins and notorious sins. The truth is that all of us are sinners, and all of us need to know that the Gospel is a message of grace. Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners.
It’s not that Jesus died for every other type of sin apart from sexual sin. It is not the unforgivable sin. So whether it’s the obvious adultery, plain to all; or the hidden but still sinful adultery of the heart, the good news is that Jesus died for your sin. All of it. No sin is too bad to be forgiven.
And in 1 Corinthians 6:9, Paul is writing to a church which was in a mess. All sorts of immorality and quarrelling, living in a city with all sorts of immorality going on. These were people with a past.
‘Do you not know that the wicked will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor male prostitutes or homosexual offenders nor thieves nor the greedy nor drunkards nor slanderers nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. And that is what some of you were. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.’ (1 Cor 6:9-11)
This sermon was preached in St Matthew's Church, Richhill on Sunday evening 22nd September 2019.
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