Tuesday, August 02, 2005

The Great Toilet Roll Prediction Competition!

Yes folks, this might be a bit of a strange posting, but have a go, and see what comes of it...

In a bid to enliven some interest and comments on the old blog, I'm launching this form of a competition... The Great Toilet Roll Prediction Competition!

Just yesterday, I began a new toilet roll in the flat, and the challenge is to name the date on which I will next need to change the roll... answers in a comment on this posting.


  1. I think your roll kitten soft will last you until next next tuesday.

  2. Gary, there are too many variables!

    What if you have visitors?
    What if you have an upset stomach?
    What if you aren't at home very much?
    What if your toilet stops working and you have to go elsewhere?
    What if you decide to fast for a day or two?
    What if somone sabotages your toilet?
    What if?

    10 days

  3. Ok... so far Ky thinks it will last until 9th August, and PRIMROSE (the anonymous) thinks it will last until 12th August. Any more predictions???

  4. I say till next wednesday...I say...is there a prize?

  5. hmmmm this is a tricky question...... as Gary is a male and males use less toilet paper than ladies on average, I do believe it will last him 3weeks and 5 days!

  6. I dunno how I'm meant to predict this! For a guess I'll say it will last till Thursday 11th :) am i being generous???


  7. I've been thinking about this all afternoon and all evening, and there are some more variables I need to take into consideration, so I might have to rethink my prediction. Can you provide accurate answers to the following questions please?

    * What brand of toilet paper do you use?
    * Is it 1, 2 or 3-ply? (Can you get 3-ply loo roll in NI? We can't in Kosova, as far as I know anyway.)
    * Is it a luxury/triple-soft type of toilet paper, or just regular bog roll?
    * How many sheets are on the roll you are currently using?
    * On average, how many times a day do you actually use toilet paper?
    * Can you tell me your dinner menu for the coming week?
    * Will you be in NTS or Dromore at the weekends?
    * How many evenings are you planning to be out in the coming month?
    * Do you have another roll of toilet paper in the house?

    That will do for tonight. The 10-day prediction stands for now. I'm off to bed. Goodnight!

  8. Primrose,

    So as to give everyone a fair and equal chance in the competition, I cannot possibly answer your questions. Suffice to say that generally, I am not in the flat from Friday morning until Sunday night, but that this weekend coming (if the loo roll makes it that far) will be different as I and several people may be staying over...

    So, the update on predictions: 9th Aug Kyrrah, 10th Aug Natalie, 11th Aug Laura, 12th Aug Primrose, 28th Aug Ruth...

  9. Oh Gary,

    If you answered the questions on here, everyone could read them so no-one would have an advantage over anyone else.

    Spoil Sport!!

    Primrose :)

  10. Wow! I've made a wonderful discovery!!

    When I was out doing some "Hiper Market" shopping this afternoon, I found extra soft 4-ply loo roll! It's "neu" apparently, called "Zewa Soft" and it's pink. I'm not fussed on the pink bit, but I like the idea of soft! So, I gave in and bought some. At Euro4.20 for 10 rolls, it was a rip-off, but I thought I'd indulge myself for once, since it has been a household item much on my mind in recent days. I haven't had the opportunity to use it yet as I still have a number of rolls of simple non-soft 2-ply loo rolls to use up first. But, I will be looking forward to the experience...Happy Days!

    Thanks Gary!

  11. Lots of time. U dont need any for stopping bleedin caused by shaving cuts unless u change ur ways

  12. Well.... inside info tells me ur half way though the roll, so in theory will finish 14th! providing no curries in the meantime

  13. NO WAY!!!!

    I object strongly.

    How did Claire get her inside info? Why does she have special privileges? Gary, you very clearly wouldn't answer my questions earlier, and then you allow others to get the inside scoop...something stinks around here!


  14. Well, Primrose, forgive me for stating the obvious, but the thing that 'stinks' might be the topic itself - seeing as it is all about the bathroom! I can indeed confirm that the roll is about halfway through...

  15. I'm sorry primrose my insider info came about b4 I signed up 4 all this blogging stuff.

    Gary enuff about ur smells!!!

  16. Well Gary, it seems quite clear to me that you have your favourites around here. That's ok with me. I'm not about to get stinkin' mad about something as below the belt as you giving clues to one friend in private, and not to another in public where everyone could benefit from the disclosures.

    Gary, all I can say is that I'm hope our friendship is going to last longer than your toilet roll!

    Claire...perhaps we should start exchanging Gary-secrets...what do you think?

  17. Primrose, I am a new friend of Garys so any secrets you wish to share would be great. He strikes me as a guy who needs more girls giving him a hard time!!!

  18. Well, after opening my metaphorical big mouth yesterday, I now realise that Gary has no secrets - or so he tells me. He assured me that there is NOTHING about his life that I know that he doesn't mind the rest of the world knowing.

    What I now need to do is figure out if he is bluffing, or if he really means it.

    The problem is that I don't want my friendship with him to end before his toilet roll, so I genuinely don't want to divulge real secrets...if I know any.

    I also need to figure out the depth of my friendship with him, because if everything I know about him is also known by everyone else, then perhaps I don't know him as well as I thought I did.

    Hm...I need to do some homework on this one.

  19. Do we really need to know this.

    What is the prize if we get it right.

  20. Ok, just so that you have an accurate progress report, please find photographic record of the loo roll, at the start, and currently... by following this link:


  21. So Gary, is there any chance you are going to finish that roll in the next 2 days?

  22. It's now Friday morning the 12th August, and the toilet roll continues... So that means that Kyrrah, Natalie and Laura were all wrong. Primrose could well be right, if it is finished up tonight when Bryan and Stewart arrive...

  23. The roll was finished at approximately 9am on Saturday 13th August. No one had correctly guessed that day, but the judge's ruling has declared that Primrose was the closest, by opting for the Friday! Well done Primrose!

  24. I WIN!!!! I WIN!!! I WIN!!!!

    I haven't won anything for a long long time, so I'm tremendously excited tonight. I'll be waiting for the prize with much anticipation :)

    On the theme...what kind of a hotel gives an ensuite room to 2 female guests in the middle of August with no loo roll on the holder? That was my Sunday night experience, and I didn't have time to go all the way down 3 flights of stairs to ask for more...so I had to knock on the door of the neighbouring room and ask, in horrendous Albanian, if I could have some of their loo roll. I didn't know the word for loo roll (I still don't) so I brought the empty roll with me as a visual aid. It worked, although I was a bit embarrassed! But, at such times, embarrasment isn't really an issue.

    Anyway, just thought I'd share my own loo roll story from the weekend in the mountains.